Sofie and Emilie
Content Warning: These stories are about violence, abuse, neglect and exploitation and may include references to suicide or self-harming behaviours. They may contain graphic descriptions and strong language and may be distressing. Some narratives may be about First Nations people who have passed away. If you need support, please see Contact & support.
Sofie is in primary school.
‘[Sofie’s] a very social child who wants to be with people,’ her mum Emilie told the Royal Commission. ‘[She] is an absolutely incredible little girl who was really looking forward to starting at her local primary school.’
The principal Emilie met was ‘absolutely fantastic’ and promised that Sofie would get everything she needed. However, there was a new principal the day Sofie started school.
‘None of the agreed adjustments were in place.’
One of the things Sofie needed to start school was a stool so she could go to the toilet.
‘When I found out that that wasn’t ready I said, “Well, not a problem. I can bring it to the school.” But I wasn’t allowed to bring it into the school. They said that they would have to arrange for it.’
Sofie couldn’t use the toilet without the stool and the school recommended putting her in pull-ups.
‘I said to them, “It’s not that she doesn’t want to, but she can’t. She can’t sit on the toilet without support for her legs.”’
Emilie said the disability toilet was partly used for storage, it was ‘scary looking’ and Sofie needed to get a key to use it.
‘We had worked really, really hard to toilet train [Sofie] prior to starting school … [Now] we had a child who was no longer toilet trained and who developed a severe anxiety for public bathrooms.’
The stool never arrived and the school wouldn’t let Emilie provide one. She began to feel ‘the whole process’ was designed to make Sofie leave.
‘We had fantastic support by the other parents, you know. No-one could understand why all of this was that difficult.’
Emilie also learnt that the school had a ‘no touch’ policy, after one of Sofie’s support workers said she wasn’t allowed to hold Sofie’s hand.
‘No helping on or off chairs in the classroom … and under no circumstance give her a hug if she needed it because you're not allowed to.’
When Emilie asked why, the principal told her those things are restrictive practices.
‘It got to the point where one of our therapists … said she can’t help [Sofie] in a setting like that because she would get complaints against her from the teacher for touching [Sofie] and for helping her with her handwriting.’
Emilie said the school also didn’t adjust the curriculum for Sofie.
Emilie was born in a country that has inclusive education where children with disability are usually supported in mainstream schools by teachers who have postgraduate degrees in special education.
‘Even just the expectations from the teachers, you know, they're there to teach this child and they see it as their role as a teacher to figure out how this child learns.’
Emilie is considering moving her family back overseas so Sofie, in her ‘most important years’ of education, can have an inclusive education. In the meantime, to prevent further harm to her daughter, she’s enrolled Sofie in a school with a separate disability support unit.
‘I truly believe in inclusive education. But I am so scared that her next school won't give her the support that she needs to thrive.’
Disclaimer: This is the story of a person who shared their personal experience with the Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of People with Disability through a submission or private session. The names in this story are pseudonyms. The person who shared this experience was not a witness and their account is not evidence. They did not take an oath or affirmation before providing the story. Nothing in this story constitutes a finding of the Royal Commission. Any views expressed are those of the person who shared their experience, not of the Royal Commission.