Simona
Content Warning: These stories are about violence, abuse, neglect and exploitation and may include references to suicide or self-harming behaviours. They may contain graphic descriptions and strong language and may be distressing. Some narratives may be about First Nations people who have passed away. If you need support, please see Contact & support.
Simona is in her late 20s and is bisexual. She lives with chronic post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
She moved to Australia about five years ago. ‘I was self-managing my disability pretty successfully without any intervention and medical treatment,’ she told the Royal Commission.
A couple of years later, she met someone and ‘ended up marrying’. The relationship was ‘abusive’.
Simona’s wife was her visa sponsor.
‘The entire time I was married … she constantly used the threat of withdrawing her sponsorship … The abuse was in every corner of my life. I couldn't escape it.’
Simona’s PTSD symptoms ‘just continued to get worse’, but she struggled to access appropriate health care.
‘The first time I wanted to seek psychological help my ex-wife refused to allow me to see a doctor. She had full control over our finances.’
That was just one of the many instances of ‘coercive control or systems abuse’. Once, her then-wife contacted the immigration department and told them their ‘relationship had ended’.
‘She told me, "You're going to get communication from the department. They're going to tell you that you have 28 days to leave," and I became suicidal. She really pushed for me to admit myself to hospital. I was obviously – I had a mental breakdown.’
Simona was unhappy with the way the hospital treated her and filed a complaint. In doing so, she discovered doctors had been treating her for borderline personality disorder (BPD) rather than PTSD.
‘My ex-wife was able to influence that to a huge extent,’ she said. Simona said her ex misled emergency and health workers to avoid being caught ‘perpetrating family violence’.
‘That really allowed her to shift the blame on me … It's pretty much going to prevent me from ever being able to receive appropriate care in the public system. Now that I have in my file that I was diagnosed BPD, that I don't have PTSD.’
Simona has seen ‘several psychologists and psychiatrists to review that diagnosis’.
‘They have all said that I don't have any symptoms of … BPD, but that I very clearly do have PTSD. But there's nothing you can do, once that diagnosis is there.’
Health workers continue to give her ‘strategies’ for regulating her emotions rather than treat her PTSD.
Simona still can't access the NDIS, and her ex-wife has withdrawn her visa sponsorship.
‘I am just in limbo on a bridging visa. It's been like this for years.’
She’s currently ‘working on’ her immigration status, but feels government agencies are ‘applying a much more critical lens’ because of both her sexuality and her disability.
‘There's no recognition that I have a disability until it's used against me in the systems that I've sought support from.’
Meanwhile, Simona has to source her own psychology services.
‘Which has been incredibly difficult, and I can't really afford the services that I need.’
Disclaimer: This is the story of a person who shared their personal experience with the Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of People with Disability through a submission or private session. The names in this story are pseudonyms. The person who shared this experience was not a witness and their account is not evidence. They did not take an oath or affirmation before providing the story. Nothing in this story constitutes a finding of the Royal Commission. Any views expressed are those of the person who shared their experience, not of the Royal Commission.