Layla

Layla is in her mid-20s and is blind. She wrote to the Royal Commission about the ostracism and ‘subtle discrimination’ she has experienced throughout her lifetime, particularly during her schooling, due to her disability.

‘In school, I struggled to fit in,’ Layla said. ‘The kids, I would say they didn't know how to handle my disability.’

This resulted in them excluding her from social activities – from parties and outings. Sometimes Layla would express her sadness about this and the kids would apologise and say ‘next time’ or make some excuse, but it never changed.

‘Because I was battling quite a lot during school, my self-esteem was just getting lowered. I had no confidence in myself, and I started beating myself up thinking, you know, if I wasn't born completely blind then this would never have happened. But then I realised it's not my blindness that gets in the way. It's attitudes.’

It was a similar situation in the classroom. Occasionally someone might ask her if she wanted to join their group for a particular activity, but often no-one did and Layla felt ‘too shy’ to ask if she could join.

This ostracism has had a lasting effect on Layla.

‘I do have anxiety issues and I am working on developing my confidence and my self-esteem. Because I was, basically throughout school and high school, I felt intimidated. At times I felt just worthless really.’

Layla also told us about the ‘subtle discrimination’ that continues to happen to her as an adult. Layla gave examples of times she wanted to volunteer or ‘try out’ for things.

‘There were times where people were making it very difficult for me. They kept saying, "Do you think you'd like to bring your mum next time or a friend?" and it's like, well, no. This is my thing, you know, this is my thing that I want to do.’

On one occasion, someone at a volunteer group called a taxi for Layla and showed her out. Apparently, says Layla, this ‘was eating into their own volunteer duties’. Later someone rang and told Layla, ‘It is difficult when someone's got other things, and we're not trying to be patronising, but do you think you'd like to bring a friend next time or have a friend come with you because it will be too difficult for you?’

‘Just basically making it difficult for me,’ is how it felt to Layla. ‘I think you guys are just saying that you don't want me. I just have the feeling that you'd rather not say you don't want me. So making me decide to pull out of my own accord because they were deliberately making things difficult.’

Another time, someone called the group together to ‘lecture’ people about not having to ‘pussyfoot’ around Layla ‘just because she's blind’. They were saying that Layla should be treated like everyone else, but they made it sound like it was Layla’s fault that people were ‘pussyfooting’ around.

One time at school, Layla was given extra time for an exam. A teacher expressed her displeasure that Layla was getting ‘special treatment’.

‘I felt that the misunderstanding and sort of emotional bullying increased because it was like they didn't understand the difference between special treatment and adapting.’

Layla believes it would make a real difference if people could understand the difference between ‘adaptation and special treatment for disabilities’.

‘I'm working … part-time now, and I feel that the job that I have been given by work is like a godsend. That's how I feel, because there are a lot of people in the job around my age, but they're very open-hearted and they seem to understand. They don't feel like I'm being treated specially, or I don't think they do. It's just accepted that things are a little bit adapted for me so that I can do my job properly like they can.’