Jax and Zadie

Zadie wrote to the Royal Commission about her 11-year-old son, Jax. He has autism and grew up in a household where his father physically and emotionally abused his mother and occasionally abused him as well. He has experienced ‘disadvantage and discrimination over and over again his whole life’.

Zadie told us that Jax’ father denied him access to crucial early therapy. Zadie felt powerless to intervene, but she believes there were opportunities for intervention when Jax was one and again when he was three, after she contacted emergency services.

She said if ‘police are prosecuting a domestic violence order in a family where a member of that family has a disability, it is imperative to ensure that family member’s safety is given priority’. Zadie believes these were missed opportunities for first responders to advocate on her son’s behalf.

Some years later Zadie left her husband. However, she said, ‘none of this trauma was identified or recognised by any of the people we came into contact with after we fled the family home’.

Eventually Jax was able to receive crucial support. He attended a support unit at the local school and received speech and occupational therapy. But Zadie said she was struggling. She was ‘damaged coming out of a nine year relationship’, was dissociative and depressed and had very little understanding of autism.

When a teacher told her ‘they pitied her on account of how difficult [Jax] is and suggested I seek medication for him’ she said she experienced a ‘despondence that immobilised me’. She stopped socialising, kept Jax home with her and felt she didn’t deserve a place in society because of her failure as a wife and mother.

Fortunately Jax has had some great therapists, but Zadie remains concerned about the high staff turnover. ‘Losing a good therapist is devastating but finding a replacement is incredibly difficult. And if you don’t gel with a good therapist you have the same problem.’

Zadie has been able to access some respite services, but says care was inconsistent. She also believes they were exploited by a few providers. In some instances they paid for services they didn’t receive.

Recently, Zadie’s mother died. It has made her fearful that Jax will have no-one if something happens to her. This prompted her to contact a disability advocacy service for support, but she has found the disability sector in their regional area to be full of cracks. She says the case worker is overloaded.

‘His recommendation was to find the strength to advocate for my son myself, as none of my concerns were insubstantial, but that he had real atrocities he had to prioritise.’

Zadie says the message from Jax’ community is that he is ‘too much trouble to be bothered with’. But she tells us it is his ‘light’ and ‘the future he is capable of having’ that is driving her to ‘challenge … discrimination on my son’s behalf, no matter where it takes me’.