Hamish and Meara
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Meara is in her 70s and lives with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, anxiety and mobility issues. Meara’s son, Hamish, lives with schizophrenia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, depression, PTSD, generalised anxiety disorder and epilepsy.
‘I picked up that he had these problems, but his father didn't recognise it,’ Meara told the Royal Commission. ‘Different people commented on it, you know, childcare, schools, teachers. I took him to doctors, took him to different places, but nobody put the pieces together.’
Meara said Hamish’s father ‘did not want to believe that he was less than perfect, so he interpreted those as signs of genius’.
When Meara and her husband divorced, Meara was granted custody. But after ‘merciless manipulation and gaslighting’ by her former husband, she let Hamish live with his father.
‘So, I sent him up there, and I hoped that things would be better, but they weren't.’
Hamish was admitted to a psychiatric hospital in his late teens. Meara said Hamish’s father had thrown out the antipsychotic medication doctors had prescribed.
‘He said, "No son of mine is going to take that schizo stuff.”’
During one psychotic episode, Meara had Hamish admitted involuntarily to a mental health unit.
‘[He] has held that against me ever since.’
Hamish used cannabis in his 20s and was admitted to a substance abuse program. While in the program, he disclosed his father had abused him as a child.
‘It was minimised and discounted, and he was told that all fathers do those sorts of things.’
Meara said later in life, Hamish reported ’17 times’ about back and abdominal pain. Doctors initially brushed it off.
‘He'd been told it was chest pain, it was just an infection, it was a bug, it was cannabis … Then he coughed up blood.’
Doctors eventually diagnosed stage four lung cancer.
Hamish is supported by the NDIS. Meara said the NDIS initially refused requests to fund his transport for cancer treatment.
‘There was nothing he could spend money on, he had $60,000 at that point, and [they said] that he wouldn't get the transport … unless it’s for mental health treatment.’
Meara said she had to get a psychiatrist to write a report explaining why the cancer treatment was important. It took nearly a year for the NDIS to fund Hamish’s transport to get treatment.
He has now completed his cancer treatment.
Disclaimer: This is the story of a person who shared their personal experience with the Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of People with Disability through a submission or private session. The names in this story are pseudonyms. The person who shared this experience was not a witness and their account is not evidence. They did not take an oath or affirmation before providing the story. Nothing in this story constitutes a finding of the Royal Commission. Any views expressed are those of the person who shared their experience, not of the Royal Commission.