Grace and Holly
Content Warning: These stories are about violence, abuse, neglect and exploitation and may include references to suicide or self-harming behaviours. They may contain graphic descriptions and strong language and may be distressing. Some narratives may be about First Nations people who have passed away. If you need support, please see Contact & support.
‘No-one even told us that learning sign language was something that we might want to do, so that our daughter could have access to a culture and a group of people that could accept, support and celebrate her.’
This was despite Grace attending a ‘(not very) special development centre … from the time she was 18 months old until preschool’ because of her profound hearing loss.
Her preschool teacher suggested Grace attend the local state primary school, but when Holly met the principal he told her, ‘Your child has a disability … she’s not coming here.’
Holly was devastated and wanted to make a formal complaint. The preschool teacher was supportive but also suggested Holly may want to find a school that would welcome Grace. So Holly paid for Grace to attend a local religious school.
At first things were promising. The principal asked Holly to show him the technology Grace used, and told Holly he thought grade 1 was the most important school year for a child.
‘He said that he would make sure that his most experienced grade one teacher would be my daughter’s teacher. He made us feel welcome, and that we had a place there.’
But rather than set Grace up for success the school made the decision to purchase the necessary equipment only if Grace fell behind.
Grace was ‘so good at masking’ that she was several weeks behind the rest of the class before they discovered she wasn’t learning. Then they had to wait for the equipment to be ordered and for staff and Grace to be trained.
The school also failed to see past her disability and treat her as a ‘whole person’.
‘Grace wasn’t seen beyond her hearing loss … only in relation to her disability.’
She was ‘bullied at school for several years’ because of her delayed start and disability and ‘now has a diagnosed mental health condition’.
Holly wonders, ‘If I had received support, and my daughter had been connected to the Auslan speaking Deaf community, perhaps I wouldn’t have pushed her so much to explore getting a cochlear implant.’
Grace kept refusing the implant and Holly ‘pushed her until it has become a source of anxiety and tension for her’.
Grace now receives excellent support and is getting on with her life.
‘Grace is a smart and independent young woman. She works full time, has a drivers licence, owns her own car and votes,’ Holly told us.
Holly would like teachers to stop focusing on what children aren’t doing.
‘Children should be set up immediately with the resources to succeed, rather than waiting for their teachers to notice that they are failing and falling behind their peers.’
Disclaimer: This is the story of a person who shared their personal experience with the Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of People with Disability through a submission or private session. The names in this story are pseudonyms. The person who shared this experience was not a witness and their account is not evidence. They did not take an oath or affirmation before providing the story. Nothing in this story constitutes a finding of the Royal Commission. Any views expressed are those of the person who shared their experience, not of the Royal Commission.