Edmond and Collette
Content Warning: These stories are about violence, abuse, neglect and exploitation and may include references to suicide or self-harming behaviours. They may contain graphic descriptions and strong language and may be distressing. Some narratives may be about First Nations people who have passed away. If you need support, please see Contact & support.
‘Diversity benefits everyone in the room. And a wonderful other side effect is that the kids without disability often feel less anxious because their culture is to accept all and that if they were to fall, there’ll be supports ready in place for them.’
Collette’s teenage kids have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and her son, Edmond, is also autistic.
‘[Edmond] loves basketball, the outdoors, spending times with his dogs,’ Collette told the Royal Commission. ‘[He] has a few close friends who care for him very deeply as well.’
Collette is a teacher and said that when she sent her kids to school she didn’t expect them to be neglected.
‘It’s the story of long-term neglect of my kids and where it got them to. So both of them are at a pretty good state now and quite happy with their lives, but it’s been a long, hard road to that.’
For example, when Edmond started school the teachers didn’t know how to support him and the principal suggested she send him to a special school on the other side of town.
‘Me having the mother guilt and thinking, “I needed to do this for my son” … and the school saying, “Well, you know, if he spends [a few] years there we’ve had other kids come back to us.” And that hope that that was going to be something that fixed him.’
Instead, the special school had such low academic expectations it caused ‘more damage’. Many of the other kids were non-verbal and Edmond started speaking less. Collette decided to move him to a mainstream school with a special education unit, hoping it would be more inclusive.
‘I thought it had lots of disability supports, but they just really pretty much all segregated all the kids within the school. And his distress just kept climbing.’
At first the school included Edmond in some regular classes, but a new principal put all the kids with disability in a building ‘fenced-off’ from the rest of the school.
‘[They] only came out for assemblies really. And there was then a cycle of teachers … wearing out or getting physically hurt by kids that were all pent up in a unit at the back of the school. It wasn’t long after that that he totally unravelled.’
When the school closed the unit, it put Edmond back into in a mainstream class, but separated him from the other kids. Collette said when Edmond was bullied, a teacher told her it was ‘the way the world works’.
When Edmond started to self-harm Collette removed him from the school for several months.
‘Even though I had gotten a lot of information around that time around disability and inclusion and adjustments I wasn’t being able to make it happen for [Edmond] at school, even with all the knowledge I had.’
Collette said she’s spent the past few years learning from other families, rebuilding Edmond’s confidence and helping his high school be more inclusive.
‘Now I am able to advocate better for my kids and stand my ground … This year I finally, after [years] of schooling, started to see things fall into place and he is beaming.’
Collette said Edmond is resilient, but will ‘carry scars’ of neglect from previous schools.
‘[I’m] really hoping that the outcomes of the Royal Commission can make it more clear what the pathways forward are. And I just hope when my kids’ kids head off to school that it’s a different story … not the same old story of hardship and heartbreak.’
Disclaimer: This is the story of a person who shared their personal experience with the Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of People with Disability through a submission or private session. The names in this story are pseudonyms. The person who shared this experience was not a witness and their account is not evidence. They did not take an oath or affirmation before providing the story. Nothing in this story constitutes a finding of the Royal Commission. Any views expressed are those of the person who shared their experience, not of the Royal Commission.