Briella
Content Warning: These stories are about violence, abuse, neglect and exploitation and may include references to suicide or self-harming behaviours. They may contain graphic descriptions and strong language and may be distressing. Some narratives may be about First Nations people who have passed away. If you need support, please see Contact & support.
Briella is in her 40s and lives with functional neurological disorder.
‘It impaired my ability to read, write, walk, hear, see, my muscles, and anything connected to your nerve system, your bowels, your cognitive function, your bladder,’ Briella told the Royal Commission. ‘My brain stopped functioning.’
Briella said she didn’t know when it started or what caused it.
‘I had a few accidents and had a traumatic upbringing as well with abuse and trauma and violence as a child as well. And we didn’t wear helmets in the 70s and I did hit the concrete at one stage.’
Briella said she struggled at school.
‘I learnt to be a pleaser and I was very good at doing things for them and I believe I was intelligent, but I couldn’t do the work they required.’
Briella later married a man who physically and sexually abused her.
‘I didn’t learn how a man should treat you and so I guess that’s how I fell into being abused as an adult as well. One of my psychologists said, “Someone taught you to be submissive.”’
After many years, she left him.
‘I wanted to get away. I was frightened and he said, “If you leave me I will destroy you. You’re alone and I will destroy you if you try and get away.” That’s how it happened. I was scared.’
Briella said that during the divorce, her lawyers allowed her to be financially abused by forcing her accept a smaller share of the property settlement even though she was raising the children without an income.
‘I actually said no I didn’t want to sign the form and when I refused to, he took another five per cent off. They pointed out all my faults and separated me from my other kids who had come to help me. And then they would yell at me and I would do as I was told, but I didn’t want to do it … My lawyer, their lawyer. They’d say they’re friends with the other lawyer.’
Briella said her disability prevents her from working. When she applied for the Disability Support Pension, Centrelink wouldn’t accept her original diagnosis and requested a new one.
‘I just have symptoms of trauma and violence and hurt that take over my body intermittently like seizures and stuff. And people don’t see that. They see strong, healthy, you look good. You can work.’
Disclaimer: This is the story of a person who shared their personal experience with the Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of People with Disability through a submission or private session. The names in this story are pseudonyms. The person who shared this experience was not a witness and their account is not evidence. They did not take an oath or affirmation before providing the story. Nothing in this story constitutes a finding of the Royal Commission. Any views expressed are those of the person who shared their experience, not of the Royal Commission.